We came home early to do some serious thinking about the boys. We decided today to make the commitment to move forward with them. We'd signed the papers in Russia, but due to some information we received we put things on hold and came home on Thursday instead of Saturday... ergo the radio silence on this end. We got home last night after 24 hours worth of travel. We went straight to Jackson's room, scooped him up and took him to bed with us. God we missed that baby!!
It's been a difficult week emotionally, lots of highs and lows and a couple of crying jags. I am not a pretty crier; I get red and snotty, my eyes puff up and I get a sinus headache. Not super fun at 32,000 feet! Thankfully we had time to talk during the flight, then we talked some more this morning. We think now that we can parent these little guys, but it's going to be challenging.
We hope that the fact that we've done this before, that Jackson is an AMAZING kid and that I only work part time means this is supposed to happen. One child with a tough background is hard, two are downright scary! We pray that their spirits are resilient and for the strength to help them know what joy and love can be found in a family. We can see in their smiles the children they are meant to be, and we think we are the family to help them get there.
The hardest part is going to be waiting for them to come home. They won't be off the database until the end of April, which means court sometime in May and home in June. That's a LONG way away, but perhaps it's for the best. It gives us time to set up any services they may need, get their room ready and save up some more money so I can be home for longer initially.
So... now we wait. And wait. And wait some more.
Chemo Round #6
1 week ago