Martha Stewart, eat your heart out!!

My gracious, I've been a busy bee this weekend!!  Lance keeps coming up to me and checking for a fever... he swears I must be ill.  I've been making freeze ahead meals for when the boys come home.  I got into the IDEA of it a long time ago, but since my middle name is "procrastination" nothing ever really happened.  In the past, I've bought and tossed about 75 pounds of ground beef and chicken, all in the name of throwing some recipes together to freeze.

This weekend, however, I came through in a major way.  I've made and frozen three shepherd's pies, three meat loaves with sauce, two packages of Honeyed pork chops and an Italian sausage casserole.  YUM!!  I actually took some photos to share, but then thought about how sad it was that I was photographing food.  I got all excited because I sprinkled paprika on the shepherd's pie... all of a sudden I felt like I was on the Food Network!  Pitiful, I am just pitiful.  Clearly I am amused by a small amount of spice.

We figured out the car seat scenario... it cost a little money, but it was worth it in the long run.  We've been griping and complaining that our current compliment of car seats and boosters wouldn't fit in our Highlander.  Several of you suggested the Sunshine Radian Kids line of car seats.  Of course, being a relative cheapskate (unless it comes to keeping my roots done) I balked at the price.  $299 for a car seat!!  Did it buckle the child in by itself?  Was it platinum plated?  Dear God!  

I read a nice little article in which someone was asked the million dollar question... would you rather pay XXX amount of dollars for new car seats, or $30,000 for a new vehicle to put your old ones in?  Ahem.  I was a bit embarrassed by the revelation.  Long story short,  I started looking at the Sunshine Kids seats with a less jaundiced eye.  I called around and found a store that actually had three in stock and would let me take them out to my car to attempt to squeeze them in.  

They fit beautifully.  It was liking watching the pieces of a puzzle click together.  Three little soldiers lined up in a row... oh, my.  There are THREE car seats in my car!!  Now I'm standing in the parking lot starting to hyperventilate and the man from the store starts offering me money off the seats in an effort to calm me down.  Three children... I'm going to have three children.  It's one of those random little thoughts that crops up during the course of a normal day.  I'll be putzing along and see three little boys with their parents, or I'll be thinking about getting something for Jack and realize that I'll have three to buy for soon.  I feel like Aunt Pitty in Gone With the Wind... has anyone got my smelling salts?

Anyway, back to the carseats.  After we found out how well they fit, I wandered back to the "outlet" part of the store to see if they had any bargains.  Lo and behold... there's one of the seats I want for $30 cheaper because it's an open box return.  I look furtively around, then my sister and I pop the tape on the box to check out the contents.  Well.... it was a final sale... I had to make sure all the bits were there, didn't I?  It was all in there, along with the manuals, so I bought it.

With that one in the middle, our other two seats fit.  We're still trying to decide if we're going to keep the older seats.  Isn't there an expiration on car seats?  I thought I read they were "good" for six years after manufacture.  Does anyone know?  If we buy new ones, I found them online cheaper with no tax and free shipping.  That'll save us about $75 off the price in the store.  Every penny counts, man.

I think that's all the news that is news around here today.  Tomorrow marks a month since we met them. It seems like time is moving quickly, but still like we have forever to go... you know what I mean?  We'll be able to sign our court petition in five weeks, then things will start flying.

Have a great week, we're wishing the best to all the other waiting families!!

Boston USCIS ROCKS!!

All of us that live in the Boston area should band together and send our local USCIS office a little love.  I have been continually amazed by their speed and courtesy.  Last August we went in on Monday the 24th for our scheduled fingerprinting appointment.  The office in Lawrence, MA is brand new, sparkly clean and the staff were so polite and helpful.  On Saturday the 29th we had our approval in our hands.  I was completely stunned.

After we got home from our first trip where we were surprised by TWO little boys, we realized that our original approval was no longer valid as our oldest son was over 24 months (the upper age limit on our form).  After speaking to our home study agency, we pulled together the paperwork to amend our USCIS approval to allow us to bring home our children.

I mailed the paperwork out last Friday... as in one week ago.  Thursday morning I received the new, amended I-171H approval.  When I got the envelope, my heart sank, I thought they were asking for more information, or telling us something was missing from our request.  When I saw the updated approval form I had to sit down.  I am just floored.  They really have it together, and they are working in the best interests of the families and children.

Thank you so much Boston office.  You have my eternal gratitude.

I am one tired girl!

I knew there was a reason I only worked two days a week!  I've been picking up extra time at my job in the ER and good LORD am I tired!  There is only so much crazy one woman can bear.  For those of you that might be thinking that a trip to the ER is a necessary part of your day, let's lay a few ground rules, shall we?

1)  Please don't start off your story with "Well, it all started three months ago..."  I'm sorry, I'm not interested in three months ago... why are you here TONIGHT?  If we need to, we can back it up and talk about the distant past once we have today figured out.

2)  (related to #1) Please don't tell me that whatever is bothering you has been going on for three or four MONTHS and that you've never spoken to your primary doctor about it.  Really?  And now it's an emergency because....?

3)  (related to #2) Please don't yell at me about why I'm not giving you something for pain in Triage when you've been having pain that you've told no one about for three months.  You waited three months, you can wait for three more minutes for me to finish asking you questions.

4) Please understand that we have to take people back based on the severity of their complaint/illness.  Don't yell at me because I took the baby that couldn't breathe to the back before I took you... when you're suffering from an ingrown toenail.  (true story)

5)  Please don't tell me that your pain is a "10" on a 0-10 scale when moments before you were chatting/laughing/texting on your cell phone, calmly reading the paper, or eating Cheetos.

6)  (related to #5) Please don't come in complaining of severe abdominal pain with a bag from Mickey D's in your hand... then in the next breath ask me if you can eat.  (true story)

7)  Please don't tell me that you thought you should "just get this ~blank~ looked at".  That's what your primary doctor is for.  Is it bleeding, falling off or exploding?  Now you have my attention.

8)  Remember there are certain orifices on the body that are designed to be "exit only".  If you stick something in there, and get it stuck, please don't be offended if I ask you how it happened.  I need to make sure no one was trying to hurt you.

9)  If your child has a fever at home, PLEASE give them Tylenol or Motrin before you bring them in.  It is not necessary for me to "see" the fever to believe you.

10)  Finally, please don't let your children play with the medical equipment or ring the nurse call bell over and over again.  It makes me want to cry when I have to pick up 748 little otoscope covers from the floor, or when I have to answer the call light 15 times because you won't stop little Timmy from pushing the pretty buttons.

Most importantly, if I seem tired or stressed, it's likely because it's been a long day and I've been at it for 12 hours.  I love my job and I love helping people, but some days are just too much!

I hope you all take this with the tongue in cheek spirit in which it was meant.  I've been a nurse for over 20 years, and I've never wanted to do anything else.  Okay, perhaps I'd like to win the lottery and move to Bimini, but short of that, I'll keep doing what I love.... "fixing people's boo-boo's" (Jack's version of what Mommy does for a living).

Have a great day... I'm heading to bed!!

Everybody's Workin' for the Weekend...

Ahhh!  The 80's.  I loved them so.  I was a huge fan of big blonde permed hair, frosted champagne pink lip gloss and black eye liner that you heated up with a lighter.  I could, and did, completely rock a banana clip!  Now I have sensible hair, subdued lip color and tastefully applied eyeliner.  When did I get old and boring?  I suppose I could try and work the eyeliner and lip gloss again, but without my spectacular neon oversize t-shirts and matching socks, the effect would be lost.

I regret not having children when I was younger.  But it just wasn't meant to be.  I didn't meet Lance until I was in my mid 30's and we flogged the fertility horse until it fell over dead in the yard.  We went through a brief (and sadly disillusioned) phase where we thought we'd be "child-free".  As usual it all ended in a crying jag...me, not Lance... and we started trying to adopt.

I wonder what kind of Mommy I would've been 20 years ago?  Would I be as self-confident?  Would I be as much fun?  Would I have been a SAHM, or would I have focused on my career?  Would I have taken my children and my family for granted?  I'll never be sure how that particluar story played out.  The only thing I'm sure of is that I wouldn't have been given the spectacular gift of being Jackson's Mom.  ~sniff, teary eyed snort~  Man, I love that boy!

Anyway, I digress.  You know what?  I'm like Dug in the movie "Up".  It's like my brain is trotting along in one direction and suddenly... "SQUIRREL!"  Now what was I talking about again?  Oh yes, I remember now... but then sometimes I don't.  I'll start a sentence and then fade off in the middle.  Lance will be looking at me with an expectant look in his eye and say "Yes? You were saying?"  To which I reply "I forgot".  Then he mutters something about me taking Aricept and Namenda for my Alzheimer's disease and how I make him crazy and how can anybody really just fall apart in the middle of a sentence...

Aaaand, there I go again.  Wow, I really did forget where I was going with this whole thing.  All I remember was singing Loverboy and reminiscing about how much fun the 80's were.  I think I'm going to go cut the neck out of a t-shirt and have a private Flashdance moment.  If you walk past an out of shape, middle aged woman wandering through Target, looking confused and singing "Maniac" under her breath, please stop and say "Hi!"  I won't remember your name, but I'll enjoy the company.

The latest news and "The Plan"

Hello Everybody!

Well, we got some good news this week.  The boys will officially be free and clear on April 10th.  They've still got some time to serve, whether it's database related or related to some other legalese-y stuff is still up for debate.  Once they're clear, we sign the petition to adopt which has to be notarized (duh!), apostilled (but of course!) and Fedex'd to Russia.  Once they receive that, they can ask for our court date.  Our agency feels like we'll likely have court the second week or so of May, right after the holidays.  Lest ye forget, those Russians are a vacation-taking people.  They loves them some holidays!  We might do better as a country if WE had more holidays, you know?

Anyway, it's certainly not set in stone, but a good educated guess.  That would put us on the exact timeline we expected... bringing them home just before or during the Memorial Day holiday here.  It seems like forever, but it's something like 10-11 weeks away.  Not such a long time before your life changes forever.  BTW, can I tell you how many times I've heard THAT one?  Um, yes, I actually do realize that bringing home two children under the age of three that don't know us or really know each other will be a life altering experience!  LOL!!  People don't mean it that way, and that's not really how I'm taking it.  It's just funny to watch their looks of horror.  They sort of smile, then look a little pained and get kind of pale.  Like they are getting a wee bit nauseous just thinking of it!  Then comes the next line, "Better you than me!"

We're really getting excited.  We're getting back into the mode we were in when we were waiting to bring Jackson home.  We watched his video every night.  Sometimes I laughed at it, some nights I cried.  But it made me feel closer to him.  I would listen to every sappy, sentimental song out there and get all blubbered up.  The worst offender?  "Somewhere Out There - Fievel's Song" from An American Tale.  In case you're (cough, cough) too young to remember it, here's the lyrics.  You'd better grab a Kleenex.  Really, go ahead and get one...

Somewhere out there,
Beneath the pale blue night,
Someone's thinking of me,
And loving me tonight.
Somewhere out there,
Someone's saying a prayer,
Then we'll find one another,
In that big somewhere out there.

(Chorus 1)
And even though I know how very far apart we are,
It helps to think we might be wishing
On the same bright star,
And when the night will start to sing
A lonesome lullaby,
It helps to think we're sleeping underneath the
Same big sky.

(Chorus 2)
Somewhere out there,
If love can see us through,
Then, we'll be together,
Somewhere out there, out where dreams, come true.

Well, I hope you're happy now!  I got all snotty and teary eyed just thinking about my boys.  They may not know or remember that we're out there, but we never forget them, even for one second.  I watch them laugh and smile on the video and my heart aches to hold them.  I see my beautiful nephew Ethan, I hold him and think about how little he is and how much he loves his Mommy and Daddy.  I think about how important and life-affirming that unconditional love is, and how that's all Ethan has ever known.... and how my boys haven't.  None of them.

Jackson knows we love him, at least I'm pretty sure he does (rotten child!).  But it took him a while to believe he deserved it.  I know it's going to take these little guys a while to believe that they deserve it as well.  And just when they're starting to believe... that's when it gets hard.  They all want to be loved, they NEED to be loved.  But so many of their life circumstances have shown them they're not worth it.  Jack was pretty easy until he'd been home for six months or so.  Then he really started to care about us and to believe we cared about him.  And he fought it... hard.  For a couple of weeks I got slapped, smacked and pinched.  I held him and rocked him and told him I loved him, no matter what.  Then one day... the very bad, horrible, no good day... he cried for almost an hour.  We rocked and rocked and rocked some more.  Then he stopped.  He feel asleep in my arms and when he woke up, it was over.  He looked at me, patted my face and said "Mama."  He finally started buying into the idea that our family was forever.

It kills me to hear his uncertainty now.  One day last week he was having a hard day and I asked him what was making him sad.  He replied, "Mommy, if Cooper and Carter love you it means that I can't love you anymore."  I asked him if he was afraid that I wouldn't love him anymore and he burst into tears.  "Yeah." was all he could say.  My poor, poor baby.  We've redoubled our efforts to ensure he understands that families are forever and NO ONE gets thrown away.  We've talked about how Mommies have room in their hearts for a hundred million babies and how I only have three.  He's getting more relaxed, and starting to talk a bit more freely and casually about his brothers.  When he sees a photo of them, he gets excited.  When he does something cool, or learns something new in school he can't wait to show them.  It's getting better, day by day.

So, here's "The Plan".  It must be capitalized, because... well, it must.  We were originally going to take Jackson on Trip Two, bop home and return to get the boys alone.  We've been given the gift of a little extra vacation time, so we've decided to make it a one trip deal.  We're going to go to Moscow, bring Jackson and stay until we can pick them up.  The two week wait will be spent with our oldest son. Loving him, enjoying his birth country and filling his little heart with a last bit of only child time.  We're planning on visiting our newest babies at least twice after court, more if we can afford it.  It will give Jackson more time to get to know them, and give them more time to know our family.  When we pick them up, hopefully it won't be such a huge shock.  

You may be right... we may be crazy (quick, name the artist and song title).  But we might as well get used to being a family of five.  And I really, really want my oldest son there from the beginning.  

I'm so WHINY today...

We had a super busy weekend!  We hauled six boxes of clothing down from the attic and sorted according to size and season.  I busted out my old information on OAMC (Once a Month Cooking) and Freezer cooking to stock up on some meals.  Lance took Jack down to the basement and did more work on patching our 100+ year old foundation and sealing the walls.  Jack likes to use the Shop Vac to suck up little concrete crumbles.  The problem is making sure that's ALL he sucking up.  We've found an interesting array of objects in the Shop Vac upon emptying it in the past!

Working with Jack in the basement goes something like this..."Buddy, don't chase the cat!  No, he doesn't like getting his fur vacuumed.  Honey, please don't suck up the wet cement... Daddy just put that on the wall.  Jack, the cement bucket does NOT need to be "Febreezed", it smells just fine.  I know you think it smells yucky, but it's the way it's supposed to smell."  You get the picture?  I think Daddy deserves a drink and a medal!

I have the boys room all done with the exception of painting our Craigslist armoire.  I'm going to work on it during the day when Jack is in school.  I should be able to get one coat of primer/paint on each day and have it done in three or four days tops.  Now when I actually start painting is up for debate... I just can't get enthused about busting out my paintbrush lately.  I moved the wall decals from the original room the the new one and think I got most of them level.  Well, level-ish anyway.  Here's a couple of photos:

Updated photo with new shelves

I've always loved this toddler bed!

        

My $60 Craigslist armoire

BTW, don't use your cell-phone when you're in Russia.  Apparently I used it more than I thought I did... we just got the bill yesterday for $482.  Lance called me while I was out shopping and told me to put down whatever I was holding and leave the store.  I had just found the cutest matching outfits for all three boys to take our annual family photos in... bummer.  Hopefully I can buy them later after I pick up a couple of extra shifts at work.

I emailed the nice people at the FBI since they still haven't charged our account for our fingerprint clearances and they've had them for over a month.  That pretty much means they haven't even opened the envelope.  I told them when we needed them in April and made a very polite, but impassioned plea to have them returned by then.  We'll see if I hear back from them next week.

You know, I really am sympathetic to them.  They've got a horrible backlog, and I know they're getting over 100 requests a day to expedite prints.  It's an impossible situation.  Maybe we could all band together and write the Vice-President, or Hilary, or even Barack himself asking for some extra help for the fingerprint division.  What do you think?

For my final flight of ideas I would like to say "Thanks!" for the car seat suggestions.  The more commonly mentioned brand, Sunshine Kid's Radian has a base measurement of 17 inches.  Our current car seats measure 17 1/2 inches.  Perhaps they'll work?  I've got to get the second seat from Nana and see if I can squeeze them in.

If you finished this post, you are either very, very bored or very, very interested in Russian adoption.  Either way, thanks for sticking it out!!

Big Hugs to all of you!

A sneak peek at they boys...

I feel peer pressured to post cute headless shots of the boys, so you can admire the chub and cuteness.  I've covered their faces since we can't legally post photos until "Gotcha day".  Unfortunately I'm not savvy enough to figure out how to lop off their heads, so I just blurred them out.  It really is sad when your computer is smarter than you are ~sigh~.

Here they are...

Go ahead... "Awwwww,  how cute!" You know you want to!!

At least one good thing is coming from the delayed court date.  I won't have to sweat the FBI clearances for another eight weeks or so.  Gotta find the silver lining in every cloud, right?  Listen up FBI people, you better get busy.  Don't make me call in my local Senator or Congressman!  (I'm just kidding FBI people, don't come after me or "lose" my application, okay?)

BTW, does anyone know if you can stuff two car seats and a booster in the back seat of a Toyota Highlander?  If you can't, how do you get a four and a half year old to buckle his own seat belt?  I ask because if I have to stuff him in the "way back" third row seating, how in the world am I supposed to reach to buckle him in?  There would definitely be some exposure of muffin top and underwear and my neighbors might complain.  I suppose I could always strap him to the top of the car, but that seems a bit extreme, don't you think?

Let me know what you do with your many small children.  And I don't want to hear anyone say the word "minivan".  It will NOT happen.